Nettiquette on Cuff-Link

So you have found your way onto the Internet. In particular #cuff-link and the Cuff-Link Community in general. We would like to share some of our experiences with you, both from personal points, and things we have witnessed ourselves.


  • Treat it like real life, treat people as you would in real life, don’t hide behind a nickname.
  • Don’t give people your life story, not everyone you will meet online will be as genuine or honest as you hope they will be.
  • Protect your personal information, like you would a PIN number. Information hackers exist in all places.
  • Research a little about the chat rooms, observe, get to know people a little, work out if it’s the type of chat room for you.
  • Be friendly, be open to chatting in the room, be interesting.
  • Get a feel for the room, what it’s about, the type of people in there, if the theme of the room is for you, how you can add to a room.
  • Do ask questions that have not already been answered in the rules, room ops will be open to being asked questions, it’s their job [keeping in mind this is volunteer work and nobody is being paid to help monitor your chat experiences].
  • Ask to private message, but take no as that, other users do not need a reason.
  • Assume that people are people before being Dom/sub/switch etc.
  • Make a profile wherever there is the availability to. Be amusing, be direct, make yourself stand out in a good way.
  • Use the #help channel for the right reasons, again the help admins are volunteers and are not paid agony aunts / uncles.


  • Go into a chat room and manage to piss off the room owners, ops and generally everyone within your typing distance.
  • Ignore the Terms of Service, they are there to protect you and other users, they have not been done because the Network Owners are bored or have Machiavellian traits.
  • Walk into a room and declare you are bored.  Room Owners and ops are not there to entertain you, and it’s rather like walking in someone’s home, uninvited, eating their food and saying you don’t like their food.
  • Private message people without checking it is OK first, even if it’s not a room rule, it can get some peoples backs up, and you may not be aware of the dynamics that person is already in.
  • Ignore room and network rules, they are there for a reason.
  • Don’t ignore when ops or network admins offer you advice, they are giving it for a reason, and often as a warning in one way or another.
  • Give out your passwords to other users, it’s a quick way to have your nickname stolen, possibly your email address, and is against network rules (for a good reason!)
  • Treat the network like you have a god given right to be there. You don’t, and until you start paying the bills that it costs to run the community, you are unlikely to. Even admins adhere to the rules.
  • Assume that every Dom/sub is going to be interested in you, simply because you identify as the opposite, not everyone is going to be suited, nor may they be looking, everyones reasons for being on a chat network differ.
  • Do not troll in rooms, do not give a shopping list in the main room of what you are and what you are looking for, that is what profiles are for.
  • Do not put “no limits” as we will merely think you have given it no thought, or you are a danger bunny. Most sensible people will avoid the latter as you will attract the wrong attention.

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